I is proper gonna vote and 'dat

The Blog of the Titans...

I’ve been an interested observer of this election and especially the tactics involved to woo us in the post-collapse, post-expenses era, as usually elections are fought on the “bottom line” battleground: Who can save us the most cash as family, as a business person, as a claimant, as a student? Who can provide jobs and cut taxes? Who can avoid looking like a total plum for long enough for us to actually get up off our fat surpluses and but a shaky X in a box with a big felt pen?

In this election a number of factors has meant that, rather than a fiscal campaign (and as much as Gordon Brown would hate to admit it) this has been an ideological campaign waged on concepts rather than strategy, on ideas rather than policy. This seems a perverse paradox at a time when our financial security is at its most vulnerable, but it does make some sense when you look deeper. The opposition parties have lobbied on the “change” vote and the focus of the leaders debates have been for the Conservatives and the Lib Dems to wage war over their credentials as the true reform party.

How is it, that in the midst of a recession, this election ends up being remembered as the campaign where Labour’s focus on fiscal security could be so easily undermined by the ideological reform focused strategy of the Lib Dems and the Tory's?

1. Obama’s successful Presidential campaign pointed the way for change agendas to transform into votes, especially when pitted against embattled incumbent parties with aging, futile leadership. British politicians are all snuggling up in their cosy beds with visions of mass global support rallies and Nobel Peace Prizes landing on their doorstep just because they represent an ideological opposite to an insane southern oil baron wielding a pointy stick in the general direction of the middle east and make some pretty cool posters.
2. The 13 year ruling party is running out of ideas faster than... errr.... a thing that runs out of ideas.
3. The lack of vote winning financial bumper giveaway’s. Traditionally we get pre-election ‘good timey’ budgets, electioneering bumfights over who can dish up the most tax cuts and moon tinted ‘boom’ promises. In this election, promises like that simply don’t make sense. In the wake of the collapse of the banking system, voters are more likely to view such promises as either fanciful whimsy or downright lies. Better not to mention it at all and distract everyone with fascinating words like ‘change’ and calling each other by their first name.
4. The expenses scandal means that the idea of politicians claiming to be the ones who will look after you financially seems almost sarcastic. The electorate don’t buy them telling us that they are the party to steady the ship, when the ship is itself awash with more dirty money and kickbacks than a prohibition era Chicago gin joint.
5. Gordon Brown = fiscal security = tax inspector dull = Labour. The opposition parties are so keen to put as much distance between themselves and Labour they’re practically falling over themselves to avoid Storming Gordon’s dour realism and trying to throw up jazz hands to distract us from the dizzying craphole we’re really in.
6. Rupert Murdoch is directing the entire election strategy of one of the main parties, ensuring that they keep hush about inevitable cuts and make preparations for all party donations to be siphoned off into the special Volcano Lair project.

All of this spells trouble for Labour, who at first tried to present themselves as a war cabinet: perhaps not the most glamorous option, but the safe one for the recovery. Then they tried “Agreeing with Nick” in a sorry attempt to woo Lib Dem tactical voters from behind the bushes by waving a Curly Whirly and blowing kisses. Finally they reverted to an original strategy of insulting their bigoted lifelong voters and amusing themselves by becoming a laughing stock, probably as preparation for the inevitable standing-down of Gordon Brown tomorrow and 10 years of unelectable infighting.

So with none of the parties focusing too heavily on the, not exactly joyous, spectre of the inevitable cuts each is looking to present themselves as ideological saviours, either as the party of “Fairness”, the party of “Change” or the party “for one” depending on their chances of success. One thing is sure, even though they’re trying not to talk about it, there’s a hell of a bill been left by the last lot. If I were them, I’d get out quick while everyone else is in the toilet.

As for today, whatever you do, make sure you vote. Especially if you want to be able to criticise, satirise, smirk at, throw eggs and kick your foot through the telly whenever one of their hideous smirking visages is vomited onto the screen, because if you don’t, the only goon to hate is yourself.

Seeyouontheothersideray. xx